This is a video I made at about the time when people started talking to themselves in their cars, and recording it to publish on the web. I figured other copywriters might relate.

The topic is “Corporate Copywriter BS,” which many in advertising have had to put up with.

I thought I should establish a “voice” in the world of copywriting. YIKES! (haha)

I actually hate hearing myself talk… can’t handle the rambling. My voice sounds very nasal due to chronic allergies. I say “um” and “y’know” too often. And… I wish that video content was not a “thing” that helps websites rank in 2024, because I would never make another video again.

I mean, there’s a reason I’m a copywriter, and not a teacher or public speaker.

I’m a writer who’s not good at talking, in the same way that some people are good at talking, but not good at writing.

This video tells a little story of what we had to put up with in Corporate Copywriting Land.

I hope you derive something of value if you listen to this. I can barely handle hearing it now, and I’m the one whose career this details. But I think the written synopsis is pretty good.

Let’s see if I can summarize this.

I worked with amazing creative people — designers and copywriters who were kind, generous, soft-hearted and displayed boatloads of talent.
We put up with a lot of crap from the pushier personalities of the corporate buying department, and some of the marketing people (though many of my same-floor colleagues in marketing were SUPER COOL!).
We wrote great copy, and then other people who didn’t have actual creative talent, made us REWRITE IT to something less exciting, for dumb reasons. 😉
We were asked to conceptualize creative themes, and then FEAR drove the department heads who controlled us, to just forgo any semblance of out-of-the-box thinking we had gifted them, only to back-pedal and reuse the same old, played-out marketing message.

Other things that happened while I worked corporate (also not in the video)

We had TEAMS of creatives putting their heads together for decisions like what point-size to make the “batteries sold separately” line.
The people who feared and sucked up to those in power at our company, said goofy things to us like “We should make the cover green, because the VP likes green.” (STOP. IT. This is why I freelance now. Just STOP. And wipe off your nose. ;))

They RELOCATED us to a more remote campus… had a new headquarters built SUPER FAST, on land that was very cheap because it was once a superfund site.
The new work building reeked of chemicals because it had JUST been built, and everything was brand spanking new.
We had to drive a double-line county road, up a mountain into the boonies of North Jersey, to our new work headquarters every day… there was no “shortcut” to get there faster.
They added all the amenities (fitness equipment, “zen lounge” with a waterfall, big break rooms) so we would never want to leave work. (There was no place to go anyway – we had one shopping center nearby where you could get lunch off campus.)
I QUIT my job because I didn’t want any of that, and because I was single and free, with no one else to support but me…

corporate copywriter — Corporate copywriters, discussing whether the line should read “Batteries not included,” or “Batteries sold separately.”

More Highlights of My Copywriting Career in Corporate America

At my 7-year corporate stint, we attended POINTLESS MEETINGS for YEARS… and then when the company came to their senses that none of these folks were actually needed, they swung the layoff axe, and SO MANY GREAT and TALENTED PEOPLE were out of work.

What Else Happened Over the Years?

After I left, my company started hiring college grads at $12 an hour. (I had been hired at $26K as a Junior Copywriter back in 1996, and my salary had essentially doubled in 7 years.)
More of my former coworkers were STILL being laid off… round after round, year after year.
Then, the company essentially WENT OUT OF BUSINESS, disappeared for a while, then re-emerged as a much smaller, highly portable, web-based version of what they were. (I didn’t say this in the video, but that’s what happened.)

What Were the Biggest Rewards of Working in Corporate Advertising?

Seven years of direct experience writing corporate in-house ad copy
Being vested after 5 years of loyalty, and having my contributions matched 50 cents on the dollar
Meeting SO MANY WONDERFUL PEOPLE whom I’m still in touch with to this day
A gorgeous portfolio of creative work
Bragging rights

As a Corporate Copywriter, I Got to Write Ads Like This.

Yes, this is actually a sample from my copywriting porfolio. I believe it was translated into Japanese, but I don’t exactly remember.

Would I take back my corporate advertising experience?

Hell no! I was frustrated much of the time, but it was also great. Mainly because of my coworkers, who made it a very special place to work.

Thanks for listening to and reading about my experience as a copywriter working in corporate advertising. I hope this supports or inspires you in some way!

Okay, so now YOU want to become a copywriter?

To learn more about what corporate copywriters do, and whether the copywriter life is for you, read this article.

Do I think it was written by a talented copywriter? Actually, no. But Yoast SEO wanted me to add an outbound link, so there you go.

Corporate Copywriters, and the BS We Endured